The “Have It All” Lie
I Ran the Numbers and You Shouldn’t Buy It.
We were told we could have it all.
As a finance professional with 17 years in investment banking and wealth management, I did what I do best: I ran the numbers on the big lie of our generation. Top-tier career. Fit body. Mental peace. Kids (or the decision to have /not have them). 8 hours of sleep. Clean eating. Glowing skin. You name it.
The math? Negative ROI. Because it is exhausting, and you only have one body, one mind, and a finite number of hours per day.
What you’ll find here
No affirmations. No 5 a.m. wake-up clubs. No “productivity hacks” to squeeze more into your already overflowing plate. This is about real trade-offs, cold audits, and the questions nobody dares to ask out loud:
What if “having it all” was never the goal?
What if the real power move is un-having the things that don’t serve your bottom line: your sanity?
I’m writing this from Europe, where the hustle culture isn’t seen as a mandatory investment. Cafés where people linger for hours. Shops closed on Sundays. Lives that don’t revolve around “crushing it” at midnight.
But this isn’t about Europe vs. America; it’s just where my background and mindset come from and I wanted you to know this from start. This is about helping others feel more free. Because freedom doesn’t mean keeping infinite options open. It means choosing, even if that means letting go of something.
Who this is for
Whether you’re 25, staring down the fork in the road (career leap or family start? Egg freeze or promotion?), or 35+ juggling the mental load of work, kids, and the invisible to-do list that never ends.
Here, you’ll find tools that make your life easier: the ones that let you decide and declutter. Finance concepts, because our most valuable asset is time. And support, because in the end, we all feel the same struggles.
Why this exists
I’ve run the numbers on every decision. Felt alone many times. Heard the same feedback and questions from friends. I found peace when I let go of the myth, set priorities, and acted on them. I’m here to help you navigate those talks about trade-offs.
What to expect
No filters. Just the raw audit you didn’t know you needed.
Weekly letters on strategic quitting: what to divest from (guilt, perfectionism, the “yes” that costs everything).
The Decision Matrix: how to decide without paralysis.
Frameworks that actually work.
Anonymous Q&A.
The European Sense of Proportion: occasional dispatches on balance.
If you’re ready to stop pretending and start choosing, welcome.
Your first step, if you feel like it
A quick audit. List your top 5 “must-haves” right now. Score each on a 1 to 10 for real cost in time, energy, and regret.
What stays? What gets divested today?
Drop it in the comments or send it anonymously. I’ll reply with a no-BS take.
Subscribe below. Let’s un-have it all! So you can have what matters.